Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul
By John and Stasi
Eldrege
So I’m about halfway through the book Captivating, and wanted to take some time to reflect on what I’ve
learned from it so far. It talks about the purpose of life for both men and
women- what they were created by God to be and to do. Men and women are very
different, revealing different qualities of God. The book obviously goes into
great detail, but here’s a brief overview of what I took away.
Men have three core desires in their hearts:
1.
Every man wants a battle to fight.
a.
This can be seen in little boys wanting to play
with toy weapons, light sabers, air soft guns, pirate swords. They wrestle and
slam each other into walls to show affection. They watch action movies, filled
with battles and fights and heroes.
2.
Men long for adventure.
a.
It can be seen in little boys jumping and
climbing and crashing. They want to be tested, and to discover they have what
it takes.
3.
Every man longs for a Beauty to rescue.
a.
Men need someone to fight for. “There is nothing that inspires a man to courage so much
as the woman he loves.” Men long to offer their strength on behalf of a woman- because
they were created to do so by God.
All women, in their heart of hearts, desire three things:
1.
to be romanced
a.
we want to be the beauty, abducted by the bad
guys, then fought for and rescued by the hero… we love feeling wanted and
fought for
b.
we want to be precious to someone, to be
pursued, desired, wanted as a woman
2.
to play an irreplaceable role in a great
adventure
a.
women are meant to be warriors too, but warriors
in a uniquely feminine way… we long to be needed and irreplaceable
b.
we desire adventure that is shared; not
adventure merely for adventure’s sake, but for it requires of us for others
c.
made in the image of a perfect relationship, we
are relational to the core of our beings
3.
to unveil beauty
a.
think of a little girl twirling her skirt and
making up a song and dance routine… she goes up to her mom or dad and asks if
they would like to hear her song, not really caring if she is an interruption,
fully expecting to be delighted in. A little girl in her glory is unashamed of
her desire to delight and to be delighted in.
b.
we desire to possess a beauty that is worth
pursing, worth fighting for, a beauty that is core to who we truly are
c.
God is beautiful, and women reflect that beauty
in a unique way.
It's pretty cool how you can see how God made men and women to be together!
Now, although man was created first, woman is certainly not
the “leftover.” In Genesis 2:7, “God formed the man from the dust of the ground
and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living
being.” Yep- that is pretty dang cool! And yet, God said that something was
missing. And that something is Eve. And so “God cast a deep slumber on the man,
and he slept, and He took one of his ribs and closed over the flesh where it
had been, and the Lord God built the rib He had taken from the man into a
woman, and brought her to the man.” (Gen 2:21-23)
Eve is the Master’s finishing touch, the crescendo of
creation. She fills a place in the world nothing and no one else can fill. Eve
bears the image of God in a different way than Adam does.
Women display God’s desire for relationships, that He is
relational to His core, and that He has a heart for romance. He longs to share
adventures with us. Women show that God has a beauty to unveil. Women are
naturally relational; they talk and are relational creatures from their
beginning. “The vast desire and capacity a woman has for intimate relationships
tells us of God’s vast desire and capacity for intimate relationships.” Yep-
God desires relationships with every single one of us. And women help display
this character trait of God. Wow.
God longs to love us, and also to be loved by us. He wants to be your priority. He wants us to
love Him, to seek Him with our whole hearts (Matt 22:36-38). God longs to be
desired just as women long to be desired. He has a passionate and romantic
heart!
Now this is one of the coolest things I’ve ever learned. Women
so often feel insignificant. But when God created Eve, He called her an “ezer
kenegdo.”
“It is not good for man to be alone, I shall make him an ezer kenegdo.” Gen 2:18
Hebrew scholar Robert Alter has spent years translating the
book of Genesis, and says this phrase is “notoriously difficult to translate.” The various English versions we have are
helper, companion, and help meet. The word ‘ezer’ is used only 20 other places
in the entire Old Testament, and in every other instance the person being
described by the word is God himself, and in situations where you need Him to
come through for you desperately. (Deur 33:26,29, Ps 121:1-2, Ps 20:1-2, Ps
33:20, Ps 115:9-11). Most of these contexts are life and death, and God is your
only hope- your ‘ezer.’ A better translation would be LIFESAVER. And ‘kenegdo’ means alongside. So yes, Eve is essential as Adam’s ezer
kenegdo!!
God longs for Romance; God longs to be our ‘ezer kenegdo.’
God revels beauty as essential to life. And women are the image bearers of this
God. So cool! Shout out to
